Friday, April 15, 2005
Roaming through the pages of my calender
looking at the dates
Seeing R.I.P. Brandon Mitchell
on every page
of the months
and I start to shed a tear
For I fear
next month
Friday The 13th
is coming near
I wonder if something will happen
I wonder what it will be
I wish I could see the future
So I can be ready
....for the pain.....
I'll break down
if another one of my friends die
I'll cry
an ocean
a watery world
made by me
a depressed girl
Brandon
I wish you were still here
You were so dear to us
and you still are
We miss you so much
We want you back
even if it's for a little chat
Please don't make
Friday The 13th
come back
I wrote this 4-13-05 & I didn't relize it was the 13th. Then I went through my agenda to look at next month. I started freakin out. Friday the 13th is coming back. i'm just hoping nuthin bad will happen.......
R.I.P. Brandon Mitchell .... I Miss you....
-
Friday The 13th
Your Bloody Valentine- FreakOnALeash @ Friday, April 15, 2005 02:57 pm
A Private Message just for me
There you go
slaming your fists into the wall
turning into a bloody pulp
stopping once
to drink beer from your cup
There you go
smashing the T.V.
because you say thats what you need
but you don't see
yourself bleeding
from all you
damned hate
Whats next?
slitting my throat?
drown mom in a moat?
Leaving suicide notes
thats in your handing writting
on our bodys?
This is what will happen if you don't stop
This is what will happen if this doesn't drop
You'll kill mom
you'll kill me
and smile
about your hateful deed
Then after awhile
you won't beileve
what you've done
Your hate won
and you cry
and cry
and cry
Then you get a gun
put it to your head
and die.
This goes a long with Reject. Sometimes I really get mad. But when my step dad gets mad he breaks things....
-
Hateful Deeds
Your Bloody Valentine- FreakOnALeash @ Friday, April 15, 2005 02:48 pm
A Private Message just for me
Excuse me for
not being perfect
Excuse me for
not being like you
Excuse me for
being a reject
and never having a clue
Excuse me for
being a girl
thats 'imperfect' in your world
Excuse me for
listening to music
that helps me let out my rage
Excuse me for
not being your age
Excuse me for
pissing you off
Excuse me for
being goth
Excuse me for
being me
Excuse me
Lonnie
Excuse me for
not being your daughter
Excuse me for
you not being my father
You don't listen
even when I'm standing right here
and you've never forgiven
me or mom
you just don't like to hear
Drink your beer
all you want
and yell at us more
because you'll never stop
you won't stop
untill you drop
This is about my step da lonnie. He pissed me off one day so I wrote a poem about how I feel the way he treats me. Once I was done writting it, I went up to him & read it to his face! He got so mad! He was just like " Go live with your father then!" & he knows that my dad molested me when I was a child. I hate both my step dad & my dad. But...Lonnie I think is okay....ususally
-
Reject (excuse me)
Your Bloody Valentine- FreakOnALeash @ Friday, April 15, 2005 02:42 pm
A Private Message just for me
My eyes go small
and I start to fall
I'll have to crawl
back to sanity
I never want you to know mother
that I'm sucidal
and I never want you to find blood
on a tile
from the times that I've cut
and you to look at me
like I'm some monster
that you've fostered
I'm so scared
about you finding out
I cry and pout
please mom
don't make me see her
she brings up too much pain
then she acts like I'm not here
like some stupid game
SO WHAT!
I mutilate
I cut
I pick at wounds
and sniff fumes
It's one secret I'll keep from you forever
I will never
let those words
get past my lips
in front of you
I rather drown in my room
knowing thats my doom
Mother I love you
so keep your ears shut
Wjem she tells you
and if you listen....
my body will start to rot
I went to the shrink and My mom brought up that I haven'y been seeing my counsler. Then my shrink said that I need to see her. SO my mom set up an appointment. My counsler said that If I come back & I've cut myself then she's gonna tell my mom! I don't want my mom to know EVER!!!!!
-
I'll Never Tell
Your Bloody Valentine- FreakOnALeash @ Friday, April 15, 2005 02:34 pm
A Private Message just for me
Saturday, April 09, 2005
Do you not see my blood tears?
Do you not hear me whispering my fears?
Do you not see me standing here?
Do you not see me at all my dear?
Why do you hide?
Why do I cry
blood tears?
Why don't you cry?
Why won't he die?
Why can't you try
to kill him?
I had thought you liked me
but that was just a lie
your fake huges
your fake sighs
your fake gleaming eyes
So many questions for you my dear
and I wish you only knew
that I was standing still right here
waiting with my love for you
But my fears had come true
You choosed him
and left me just a friend
so now I watch at a distance
wondering what could of been
You look at me
with your dark eyes
but I look away
your dark eyes would make me cry
but I'm crying anyway
When I think of you
more blood trickels down
and falls in the puddle on the ground
your not here to wipe my tears away
So here I lay
Crying Blood Tears
Okay the thing with Kristine went sorta down the drain. The day that I came back from school she had hickies all over her neck. Big ones too! Then the guy she sits by (who is also goth) Had Hickies all over his neck. Then they said in German that they went to each others houses. Yeah and their always hanging around each other.....She never talks to me anymore either v_v. She looked really pretty yesterday with her hair down (she always wears it up in a ponytail).....
-
Blood Tears
Your Bloody Valentine- FreakOnALeash @ Saturday, April 09, 2005 06:36 pm
A Private Message just for me
Sunday, April 03, 2005
Here I sit
with my brown hair
shining red from the sun
my green eyes like emeralds
My Irish side seems so bare
as I flow back
to Irish history
They would come to New York
for find a happyier life
but that ended in a disaster
they had to take up knifes
Living off the streets
with nothing on their feet
stealing food
from burning houses
the natives always so crude
They would come off the boats
but then be sent to battle
not even having time
to say goodbye to their fokes
We are still here
us Irish people
I'm proud to say
That I'm an Irish girl
and I'll scream it
to the whole world
I watched gangs of new york and It really hit me...hard. So I wrote this. Actually I just finished it cuz my mom interupted me yesterday when I was writting it.
-
Irish Girl
Your Bloody Valentine- FreakOnALeash @ Sunday, April 03, 2005 10:51 am
A Private Message just for me
Friday, April 01, 2005
Bleed these colors open wide
Burning blues from butterflies
(Tonight we, Tonight we fly)
Flying faster through the night
Until the orange of morning light
(Dear black goodbye, Dear black goodbye)
I know it's hard to make this work
When you're all alone (Alone)
And I've been waiting for so long
To hold you in my arms
Embrace forever my sweet girl
Water fills these open eyes
(Tonight we fly)
Still flames in valentines
Won't keep me in her mind
(Dear black goodbye, Dear black goodbye)
I know it's hard to make this work
When you're all alone (Alone)
And I've been waiting for so long
To hold you in my arms
Embrace forever my sweet girl [x2]
You are the ghost of everything I'm not
And I want be [x2]
Dear black goodbye (Goodbye)
Don't forget to write
Your name inside of my life
And I know it's hard to make this work
When you're all alone (Alone)
I've been waiting for so long
To hold you in my arms
Embrace forever my sweet girl [x2]
I have this song stuck in my head!!! Literally I can't get it out so here get it stuck in your head along with me!!!
-
Hawthorne Heights-Blue Burns Orange
Your Bloody Valentine- FreakOnALeash @ Friday, April 01, 2005 11:17 am
A Private Message just for me
Thursday, March 31, 2005
Sparkling blue eyes
as blue as the skies
and long brown hair
soft and fair
A black dress she wears
a romantic look she bares
as she stands in the sand
the waves crashing
and running over her feet
knowing that I'm her biggest fan
I walk up beside her
and hold her hand
digging our toes into the sand
and smile as we stare out into the sea
the wind flying through our hair so freely
We turn and look at each other
and kiss passiontly
I wish we could stay like this forever
bliss for eturnity
I whisper in her ear
I Love You
and she whispers back the same
I pull her close to me
as she smiles with glee
I tell her that she has stolen my heart
and to protect it from all poisen darts
to keep it close to her heart
and she says
I will forever
the girl at the top is about the girl that I wrote about in the poem. BUT in Angel she isn't romantic...and such....if you watch the show you would know. I'm like in love with her eyes and I Kinda have a crush on her! She's so cute & pretty!
-
Blue eyes of Romance
Your Bloody Valentine- FreakOnALeash @ Thursday, March 31, 2005 12:11 pm
A Private Message just for me
Tuesday, March 29, 2005
-
BISEXUAL PRIDE!!!!!!!!!!! WOOHOO!!
Your Bloody Valentine- FreakOnALeash @ Tuesday, March 29, 2005 01:34 pm
A Private Message just for me
I cut to deep
I cut to the bone
I see my husband weep
and then he runs to the phone
I fall to the floor
bleeding to death
but it's to late
for I just breathed
my last breath
The Ambulance comes
but it's not for me
it's for my child you see
I was with child
but I couldnt stand living anymore
My body is rushed to the hospital
then taken to labor and Delivery
they cut me open
and end my childs sufficating misery
But because of me
My child is also dead
she didn't even have a chance to cry
I didnt intend
for her to die
but thats how it ends
so dont weep for me
but weep for my child
For I killed her
Okay yes it's about a true story, BUT I didnt have all the details! The part about the mother killing herself Well I dont know how she died. Your proably wondering how I got a hold of this story too.... My mom is a nurse & she came home yesterday and told me about this girl that came in dead but she was pregnate so they deicded to cut her open & try to save the baby but the baby died a little bit after they took it out. My mom was really tramatized about it.... So I wrote this since it was kinda bothering me. I say it the hardest & weirist poem I've ever written!
-
Two Deaths In One Body (based on a true story)
Your Bloody Valentine- FreakOnALeash @ Tuesday, March 29, 2005 09:49 am
A Private Message just for me
<~~~You wish!!!
